Johnny please don't tell the people bout the bluebirds flight
Wasting education on a Tuesday night
Yes, you are my [bad word]  you're just being mean
Covering up the muscle in your Jordash jeans

Stick up the phone, who is it?
Someone [bad word] to visit
Everybody do the hokey pokey, do the crackhouse blues!

Do the mashed potato till your feet glow green
Got to sweep the floor to keep the crackhouse clean
Took me to the movies, but the doctor said
Leave him to get beaten by the black eyed meds

Stick up the phone, who is it?
Someone [bad word] to visit
Everybody do the hokey pokey, do the crackhouse blues!

Now the captain ran for cover when the steamboats crashed
Driving off the bridges cause they got no class
Barbara's got my number, now I've got [bad word] 
Pizzas to deliver in the crackhouse slum, you know...

Sometimes when the night gets hot
I search around for the crack I lost
I wouldn't expect for you to notice me
I would not expect you to say 'Johnny!'

Do the mashed potato till your feet glow green
Got to sweep the floor to keep the crackhouse clean
Took me to the movies, but the doctor said
Leave him to get beaten by the black eyed meds

Stick up the phone like we do
Someone [bad word] to see you