I pulled out for San Anton’
I never felt so good
My woman said she’d meet me there
And of course, I knew she would
The coachman, he hit me for my hook
And he asked me my name
I give it to him right away
Then I hung my head in shame
Lo and behold! Lo and behold!
Lookin’ for my lo and behold
Get me outa here, my dear man!
 [bad word] into Pittsburgh
At six-thirty flat
I found myself a vacant seat
An’ I put down my hat
“What’s the matter, Molly, dear
What’s the matter with your mound?”
“What’s it to ya, Moby [bad word] 
This is chicken town!”
Lo and behold! Lo and behold!
Lookin’ for my lo and behold
Get me outa here, my dear man!

I bought my girl
herd of moose
One she could call her own
Well, she came out the very next day
To see where they had flown
I’m goin’ down to Tennessee
Get me a [bad word] ‘r somethin’
Gonna save my money and rip it up!
Lo and behold! Lo and behold!
Lookin’ for my lo and behold
Get me outa here, my dear man!

Now, [bad word] in on a Ferris wheel
An’ boys, I sure was slick [bad word] in like a ton of bricks
Laid a few tricks on ’em
Goin’ back to Pittsburgh
Count up to thirty
Round that horn and ride that herd
Gonna thread up!
Lo and behold! Lo and behold!
Lookin’ for my lo and behold
Get me outa here, my dear man!