When the [bad word] When the death rays hum
When the bombers bomb
We'll still be freakin' friends

When the [bad word] down
When they nuke the town
When dead clowns can't clown
We'll still be freakin' friends
 [bad word] 
Freakin' friends,
Freakin' friends,
Till [bad word] to bad ends,
We're freakin' friends.

Freakin' friends,
Freakin' friends,
Till [bad word] to bad ends,
We're freakin' friends.

When the 'skeeter bites
Lightning hits our kites
When we miss our flights
We'll still be freakin' friends

When my number's called
When my garden's walled
When my tires are bald
We'll still be freakin' friends
 [bad word] 
Freakin' friends,
Freakin' friends,
Till [bad word] to bad ends,
We're freakin' friends.

Freakin' friends,
Freakin' friends,
Till [bad word] to bad ends,
We're freakin' friends.

I was halfway down the plank
Had a stick against my flank
Then you pulled up in the Tank
Rock on...

(Guitar solo)

When we're parched with drought
And we can't catch trout
When my voice gives out (cough)
We'll still be freakin' friends

When the razor cuts
When they torch the huts
When I hate your guts
We'll still be freakin' friends
 [bad word] 2x)
Freakin' friends,
Freakin' friends,
Till [bad word] to bad ends,
We're freakin' friends.

Freakin' friends,
Freakin' friends,
Till [bad word] to bad ends,
We're freakin' friends.

Freakin' friends,
Freakin' friends,
Till [bad word] to bad ends,
We're freakin' friends.

Freakin' friends,
Freakin' friends,
Till [bad word] to bad ends,
We're freakin' friends.