There's a place where some of us choose to live
[bad word] cops [bad word] in
neighborhood for punks over the hill
We're spendin' our golden years in Mattersville
We can do whatever we want whenever we please
There's always a keg of beer and a block of cheese
We got charams, pinball, asteroids, space invaders and [bad word] 

We will grow old together 
We will play bridge and Texas hold 'em
Duane and Stevie Cab they still skateboard
But most of us lawn bowl and shuffleboard
We may be getting ripe but we ain't bored

We got a blackboard with [bad word] and laws
Hefe's got an 18 car garage
Most of the cars are smashed and so is Spike
Twice a week on karaoke night
Eric Melvin lives next door to me
Limo and the Locknecks head security
At the end of my cul de sac
Davey Havok's house is painted black

We will grow old and fatter
We got our ville so what else matters?
Trashy, Mod, and Kath are staying up
Nathan, Matt, and Dad are passing out
When California cracks we're all goin' down