Greetings y'all
 And [bad word] all you danged foreigners from other nations
 Dear Lord be with our guests and prepare them
 For the butt whopping they are about to receive

 The Olympics in Georgia
 God you know we're gonna [bad word] that up
 I guarantee you
 When they let those doves go at the opening ceremony
 There are gonna be guys in the parking lot with shotguns

 And we will not have a flame
 That big without a pig on it, I guarantee
 Some fat guy going
 “Danged good barbecue top of them stairs up there
 They ain't got no hand rail be careful"

 Of all the games that the rednecks play
 There's some crazy events
 If you know about the redneck ways
 Then it makes perfect sense

 [bad word] the Olympic rings will be five old tires nailed together
 See that's my fear, they're gonna get the list of events
 They gonna have no idea what half this stuff is suppose to be
 Like for fencing, they'll be giving people bailing wire and sheet metal
 There probably have to cancel water polo after
 The first two or three horses drown
 I tell you instead of discus throwing
 They'll be flinging Ford hubcaps

 You can't blame them for the way they are
 But you can sit back and grin
 'Cause they'll do something that's so bizarre
 You'll want to see it again

 If you could ever get into their minds
 There's no telling what you might find
 They just do things in a different way
 All the games that the rednecks play

 And you know they haven't even thought about it
 But the river they're having the kayak races
 On is the same river they filmed deliverance at

 That ought to add a whole degree of difficulty shouldn't it?
 'Cause if Ned Batty couldn't make it down
 That thing a French man in a pair of biker pants ain't got a chance

 Be prepared to watch the wildest show
 Making her out in the line
 You may not see them bringing home the gold
 But they'll sure make mama proud

 If you could ever get inside their minds
 There's no telling what you might find
 They just do things in a different way
 All the games that the rednecks play

 Hey Ed, I got a white one