There are those
I suppose
Think we're mad
Heaven knows
The world has gone
To rack and [bad word] 
What we think is chic, unique and quite adorable

They think is odd and sodom and gomorrah-able
But the fact is
Everything today is thoroughly modern
Check your personality
Everything today makes yesterday slow
Better face reality.
It's not insanity

Says Vanity Fare
In fact, it's stylish
To raise your skirts and bob your hair.
In [bad word] seat, the world is so cozy
If the boy is kissable

And that tango dance they wouldn't allow
Now is quite permissible.
Goodbye, good'-goody girl
I'm changing and how!

So beat the [bad word] 
Coz [bad word] thoroughly modern
Millie now!
Everything today is thoroughly modern
Bands are gettin' jazzier

Everything today is starting to go
Cars are gettin' snazzier
Men say it's criminal
What women'll do.
What they're forgetting is
This is Nineteen Twenty-Two.

Have you seen the way they kiss in the movies?
Isn't it delectable?
Painting lips and pencil lining your brow
Now is quite respectable.

Goodbye good'-goody girl
I'm changing and how!
So beat the [bad word] 
Coz [bad word] thoroughly modern
Millie now!