The Egg Marketing Board Tango
Chords and TV version donated by a friend of the page.

Intro

It's the Egg Marketing Board Tango,
In other words, the dance of love.

You go down to the palais and you're eager for a dance,
You see a lovely stranger and your eyes meet quite by chance.
She's warm and she's desirable with lips meant to be kissed,
So you stand eight feet apart and do the twist. Oh Lor'!

But in the tango you gets the chance to hold her oh so near,
And you gaze into her lovely eyes of blue.
And while you're dancing you whisper sweet nothings in her ear,
And she says, "Sweet nothing doing," back to you.

You give her ear a nibble, you give her cheek a peck,
You've got her in a grip of steel, you're breathing down her neck.
And then she says those magic words that thrill you through and through,
"You've been eating pickled onions, haven't you? Oh poo!"

Once I met a girl called Kitty who was pretty as could be,
She lived up in the city and she asked me 'round to tea.
But pretty, witty Kitty, she tried to pull my leg,
So I hit her, what a pity, with a soft-boiled egg.

Then the wireless played a tango and I held her in my arms,
As we swayed and we glided 'round the room.
And when her [bad word] in we carried on, alas I didn't know,
He was deaf and he couldn't hear the tune.

He punched me in the ear'ole and he hit me with a vase,
He chased me down the garden and he kicked me on the grass.
So now I swear I'm finished, as [bad word] as stars above,
With the tango, the dance of love.