Whoa yeah, Segway Polo
Gotta hit the ball with the wooden mallet
Even the professionals don't know how to ride a segway scooter
It's okay bro, hug it out, yeah.
Hit the ball into the goal
Because that's how you win at Segway Polo
This is the most intense sport I've ever-
Whoa! That guy's wearing lederhosen yeah

Oh no! There appears to be a dispute on the field!
This German dude is really [bad word] off
Dude, chill out. It's just Segway Polo
Kid Rock was not paid enough to listen to your [bad word] 
There's an ambulence in case you get a boo-boo
There's a merch table in case you want to buy [bad word] Electric unicycles pretty much kick [bad word] 
This guy's going through a mid-life crisis

Segway Polo, heck yeah!
Kid Rock, heck yeah!
Black people, Heck yeah!
Bouncing boobies, HECK YEAH!!!

This guy's waiting for some surprise butt ***
HERE [bad word] 
Look at me mom! I'm failing on the internet!
This guy's getting tired of playing Segway Polo
Because standing on a segway is very physically demanding

Oh snap! It's tied! Have to go to a shoot out!
I'm super excited! They're super excited!
LET'S DO THIS!
Shoot
Miss
Shoot
Miss
Shoot
Miss
Shoot
Miss
Shoot
Whoa score!
YOU WIN!
Now hump your teammate!