Little wooden soldier boy
How he's bored to be a toy
Sitting on the mantelpiece
Was not his idea of peace

So one night at half past one
He ordered all the toys [bad word] He told them all a good game to play
Next day

The teddy bears and wind-up toys
Together made a lot of noise
The other side formed into ranks
Proud 'cause they had plastic tanks

High up on the shelf to see
The soldier had to jump with glee
At last before his eyes he saw
real war

With a battle raging on the floor
The soldier boy was urging more
Soon the floor was strewn with bits
Fur and stuff and building kits

The soldier boy was feeling high
As smoke clouds rolled across the sky
He gave a last triumphant cry
And fell into the fire