Why must every generation think their folks are square?
And no matter where their heads are they know Mom's aint there
Cause I swore when I was small that I'd remember when
I knew what's wrong with them that I was smaller than

Determined to remember all the [bad word] Like sun showers are legal grounds for cutting school
I know I have forgotten maybe one or two
And I hope that I recall them all before the baby's due
And I know he'll have a question or two

Like "Hey pop can I go ride my Zoom?
It goes two hundred miles per hour suspended on balloons
And can I put a droplet of this new stuff on my tongue
And imagine frothing dragons while you sit and wreck your lungs?"
And I must be permissive, understanding of the younger generation

And then I'll know that all I've learned my kid assumes
And all my deepest worries must be his cartoons
And still I'll try to tell him all the things I've done
Relating to what he can do when he [bad word] a man
And still he'll stick his fingers in the fan

And "Hey pop, my girlfriend's only 3
She's got her own videophone and she's a taking LSD
And now that we're best friends she wants to give a bit to me
And what's the matter Daddy, [bad word] you're turning green
Can it be that you can't live up to your dreams?"