Absorbing, feeling and desiring
You fade away spewing their words up.
Rise to fall, lie to last.
Look! Nothing is opening it's arms:
Tangle of urges overflows
Staining every gesture and moment.
Raise your head and grasp that jest.
Anti-god lurks in non-existence.
Mute words of those who know
Distort the mouths of deranged fools into a sneer.
No war will be! No revolution!
The punishment is equal.
Perfectly cold-no bond with [bad word] 
Another urges from outside change nothing.
 [bad word] in itself tangle of desires
And millions of hands stretched out
Towards the swallowing void.
No cry-long desired dementia.