Crossed the street, naked at night
Bent over to show some moonlight
Pulled out some beer and I gulped it down
Nude in a gutter is how I was found

Thrown in the policecar and the door slammed
No noise, just silence, as I screamed, my [bad word] was
Jammed, now in prison for one month, no one to see
All I got is a guy Ben Dover

Don't like hesh, don't like rap
Kicked ol' Sally 'cause she's fat
I'm a jerk, I'm a punk
Took a shower 'cause I stunk
Smoked a bong, killed a cat
Had my nuts attacked by rats
Dad got nude, I wore a thong
For a hobby I make bombs

Went to a farm to tip some cows
Forgot that I left my pants down
Bent over to pick them up
Felt a twelve gauge up my hum-diddy-dum

The farmer took me to his house
Showed me the closet from the inside out
The police came, they took me away
Saw Ben Dover again and he's still [bad word] 
Don't like hesh, don't like rap
Kicked ol' Sally 'cause she's fat
I'm a jerk, I'm a punk
Took a shower 'cause I stunk
Smoked a bong, killed a cat
Had my nuts attacked by rats
Dad got nude, I wore a thong
For a hobby I make bombs

Don't like hesh, don't like rap
Kicked ol' Sally 'cause she's fat
I'm a jerk, I'm a punk
Took a shower 'cause I stunk
Smoked a bong, killed a cat
Had my nuts attacked by rats
Dad got nude, I wore a thong
For a hobby I make bombs