"Simmer down ladies and gentlemen
you're acting rather irresponsibly"

Hold your horses, steady now,
'Cos we're floating precariously and therefor furthermore frivolously
On tectonic plates
And everything we stand on and everything we stand for
is rather unstable right now
So I think I'll kill some time and have you done medium rare
But i think I'll tease my pallet with some [bad word] s, just to prepare
Cos you see we've had a joker in the pack now for quite some time
So i reckon it's just about time to roast this swine

This is a crock of [bad word] i refuse to be fed!
So knuckle down and fetch his head (*wining in the background*)
Can it sunshine, bottle it up you ponce
Then knock me up a dish with some vol-au-vents

Now i think we should take a leaf from the romans book
Throw it up
Lets throw it up and then start again

Nicely does it now
Steady...
Wait for it... steady... hold... hooolllldd....target locked
Cop a load of this one
oi oi [bad word] do one mate. on your bike.

that was great, [bad word] to the chef, I'm very sat-is-fied
i'll be sure to dine here again, fine cuisine.
the stuffed cheeks were very agreeable,

all in all a splendid spread.