Well ask if we can have six in
If not we'll have to have two
Well [bad word] up our end aren't you?
So I'll get one with you

Oh won't he let us have six in?
Especially not with the food
He coulda just told us no though
He didnt have to [bad word] 
You see her in the green dress?
She talked to me at the bar
Well [bad word] its already two pound fifty?
We've only gone about a yard

Didnt ya see she were gorgeous?
She was beyond belief
But this lad at the side, drinkin his Smirnoff Ice
Came and paid for her tropical reef

And I'm sitting going backwards
And I didn't want to leave
I said its high green mate
Via Hillsborough please

Well how funny was that sketch earlier?
Up near that taxi rank
Oh no you would have missed it
Think it was when you went to the bank

These two lads squaring up, proper shoutin
Bout who was next in the queue
The kind of thing that would seem so silly
But not when they've both had a few

Well calm down temper temper
You shouldnt get so annoyed
Well youre actin like a silly little boy

Oh they wanted to be men
And do some fightin in the street
Said, no surrender, no chance of retreat!

So hidin in the taxi
Cause I didn't want to leave
I said its high green mate
Via Hillsborough please

Well [bad word] plots hatched to jump it
Ask around, are ya sure?
Went for it but the red light was showin
And the red light indicates doors are secured