[bad word] one [bad word] all!
Leave your loops and milking stools
Coop the hens and pen the [bad word] one [bad word] all!
Close the churches and the schools
It's the day for [bad [bad word] and join the feast of...
Fools!

Once a year we throw a party here in town
Once a year we turn all Paris upside down
Every man's a king and every king's a clown
Once again it's topsy turvy day
It's the day the devil in us gets released
It's the day we mock the prig and shock the priest
Everything is topsy turvy at the feast of fools

Topsy turvy!
Everything is upsy daysy
Topsy turvy!
Everyone is acting crazy
Dross is gold and and weeds are a bouquet
That's the way on topsy turvy day

Topsy turvy!
Beat the [bad word] and blow the [bad word] Topsy turvy!
Join the bums and thieves and [bad word] Streaming in from Chartres to Calais
Scurvy knaves are extra scurvy
On the sixth of January
All because it's topsy turvy day [bad word] one [bad word] all!
Hurry, hurry here's your chance
See the mystery and [bad word] one [bad word] all!
See the finest girl in France
Make an entrance to entrance
Danse la Esmeralda
Dance!

Here it is, the moment you've been waiting for
Here it is, you know exactly what's in store
Now's the time we laugh until our sides get sore
Now's the time we crown the King of Fools
So make a face that's horrible and frightening
Make a face as [bad word] as a gargoyle's wing
For the face that's ugliest will be the King of Fools
Why?

Topsy turvy!
Ugly folks, forget your shyness
Topsy turvy!
You could soon be called Your Highness
Put your foulest features on display
Be the king of topsy turvy day

Everybody!
Once a year we throw a party here in town
Hail to the king
Once a year we turn all Paris upside down
Oh, what a king!
Once a year the ugliest will wear a crown
Girls, give a kiss!
Once a year on topsy turvy day
We've never had a king like this

And it's the day we do the things that we deplore
On the other three hundred and sixty-four
Once a year we love to drop in
Where the beer is never stoppin'
For the chance to pop some popinjay
And pick a king who'll put the top
In Topsy Turvy Day
Topsy turvy
Mad and crazy, upsy daysy, Topsy Turvy Day!