powdered sugar on your fingers, 
coffee on your shirt
bribes in your pocket, 
you never do any work
you fat [bad word] slob 
you just sit in a car
until you get off work 
then it's back to the bar
 [bad word] ]
you [bad word] pig-pig
you're a [bad word] cop-cop [x4]

you never catch any crooks 
but harass everyone else
your fat fingers don't fit the trigger 
you're too slow to catch a [bad word] you're a suburban cop 
because you're scared of the city
you broke a stool at dunkin donuts
because you're so [bad word] fat
 [bad word] 

[repeat first verse]
 [bad word]