Albert is smart, he's a genius 
 Watch Albert putter, an obvious genius 
 Someday he will reassess the world 
 And he'll still have time for lots of girls

 When he grows up he'll remember us 
 When he grows up we are sure that he'll remember us

 We made sure that Albert wore his mac 
 We kept all the strangers off his back

 [bad word] 

 (Go away) 
 Everything's relative 
 (Go away Albert's mother does say to me) 
 We are his relatives and he don't need any non-relatives

 Talent is an asset 
 You've got to understand that 
 Talent is an asset 
 And little Albert has it 
 Talent is an asset 
 And Albert surely has it

 One day he'll sever his apron strings 
 All of the while he'll be scribbling things, genius things 
 Look at Albert, isn't he a sight 
 Growing, growing at the speed of light

 [bad word] 

 (Go away) 
 Everything's relative 
 (Go away Albert's mother does say to me) 
 We are his relatives and he don't need any non-relatives

 Talent is an asset 
 And little Albert has it

 Talent is relative 
 That's hypothetical 
 We are his relatives 
 That's parenthetical 
 Spare your superlatives 
 There's the receptacle 
 There's the receptacle

 Leave Albert's study room 
 Leave Albert's happy home 
 Leave Albert's neighbourhood 
 Leave Albert's city, too 
 Leave Albert's country seat 
 Leave Albert's coun-ter-y 
 Leave Albert's continent 
 Leave Albert's hemisphere 
 Leave Albert's planet, too 
 Leave Albert's universe

 No one must see him now 
 Only the medical 
 No one must downgrade him 
 Don't be to cynical 
 Don't be to critical 
 Cancel the magazines 
 They're much to political 
 Don't buy him any jeans 
 They're much to casual 
 Talent is relative
 That’s hypothetical 
 We are his relatives 
 That's parenthetical