You can read it in the papers
In some places [bad word] in thirty-two flavors
But you wouldn't tell no one
Your favorite if you could

From the White House to the alleys
From the President down to Long Tall Sally
Can't live with it but
You'll die without it - yes you would

Senorita's in the kitchen
She's a fistful of dynamite
You call 911 but you
Can't stop the fun tonite, it's alright

You can't start a fire without a spark
But there's something that I guarantee
You can't hide when infection starts
Because love is a social disease

Where you look you can find it
Try [bad word] but you're always behind it
So you play hide and seek like a blind kid
Till you're caught - yeah you're caught

So you'll say that you had some
But they took it and held it for ransom
Were they tall, dark, skinny or
Handsome - you won't talk

So you telephone your doctor
Just to see what pill to take