I’m a dog shaped ashtray
I’m a [bad word] moustache wearing a speedo tuxedo
I’m a movie with no plot
Written in the back seat of a [bad word] powered taxi
I’m an imperial armpit, sweating Chianti

I’m a toilet with no seat, flushing tradition down
I'm socialist lingerie, I'm diplomatic techno
I'm [bad word] pastry and racist cappuccino
I’m an army on holiday in a guillotine museum
I’m a painting made of hair, on a nudist beach
Eating McDonald's
I’m a novel far too long, I’m a sentimental song
I’m a yellow tooth waltzing with wrap around shades on
Who am I? I am Europe