Last time I was sober, man I felt bad
Worst hangover that I ever had
It took six hamburgers and scotch all night
Nicotine for breakfast just to put me right
'Cos if you [bad word] cool
If you [bad word] cool
If you [bad word] cool, you got [bad word] On heavy, heavy fuel

My life makes perfect sense
Lust and food and violence [bad word] and money are my major kicks
Get me in a fight I like dirty tricks
'Cos if you [bad word] cool
Yes if you [bad word] cool, you got [bad word] On heavy, heavy fuel

My chick loves a man who's strong
The things she'll do to turn me on
I love the babes, don't get me wrong
Hey, that's why I wrote this song

I don't care if my liver is hanging by a thread
Don't care if my doctor says I ought to be dead
When my ugly big car won't climb this hill
I'll write a suicide note on a hundred dollar bill
'Cos if you [bad word] cool
If you [bad word] cool
Yes if you [bad word] cool, you got [bad word] On heavy, heavy fuel