The muffin man is seated at the table in the laboratory of the utility muffin
Research kitchen... reaching for an oversized chrome spoon he gathers an
Intimate quantity of dried muffin remnants and [bad word] his scapular aside
Procceds to dump these inside of his shirt...
He turns to us and speaks:

Some people like cupcakes better. I for one care less for them!

Arrogantly twisting the sterile canvas snoot of a fully charged icing
Anointment utensil he poots forths a quarter-ounce green rosette (oh ah yuk
Yuk... lets try that again...!) he poots forth a quarter-ounce green rosette
Near the summit of a dense but radiant muffin of his own design.
Later he says:

Some people... some people like cupcakes exclusively, while myself, I say
There is naught nor ought there be nothing so exalted on the face of gods grey
Earth as that prince of foods... the muffin!

Girl you thought he was a man
But he was a muffin
He hung around till you found
That he didn't know nuthin

Girl you thought he was a man
But he only was a-puffin
No cries is heard in the night
As a result of him stuffin
 [bad word] fowler on trombone, napoleon murphy brock on tenor sax, and lead vocals,
Terry bozzio on [bad word]  tom fowler on bass, denny walley on slide, george duke
On keyboards, captain beefheart on vocals, and soprano sax, and madness. thank
You very much [bad word] to the concert tonight. hope you enjoyed it. goodnight
Austin, texas, where ever you are.