[bad word] to the valley and the land of thieves
Where they put you in the jail so you never leave
I was crossing the bridge for my destiny
Now I got to find the guys who do carpentry

I’m not the kind of guy that could hit a woman
But I guess in your case, you’re asking for it
You know you’re going down, before the [bad word] I’ve been through water, and the fire, and the forest

- Don’t think cause you got two swords
That I can’t own you with a bow and arrow
Paralyzed, then I sneak around
Looking for another way to get me out

Once I save the guys who do carpentry
I got to show my skills doing archery
The biggest quiver, call it excessive
But I got to get it done to get through the desert

Why you got to make this hard?
I pull out my member’s card
You can call me V.I.P., Don’t
Ask if you can see I.D.

- take me lightly?
You don’t wanna see it when we start fighting
You can’t move, like a skulltula
Got another token, longshot pulling up

Don’t challenge me, [bad word] Man.
This valley ain’t big enough for both of us
The fastest one, on Epona.
Watch me move when I pwn ya.

I dominate this training ground
- on my way to chasing down
the ice arrow, no need for rings
Is the desert hot, or is it just me?

Then [bad word] to the Haunted Wasteland
Dirtier than my mom’s old basement
- River Sand, I think it’s windy
- Give a hand, I’m sinking quickly

- and they say, don’t follow the mirage
Follow the flag, follow the ghost
You never know, where to go
These god [bad word] leevers, leave me alone!

Dinolfos, Lizalfos, and Beamos, and Wolfos
Don’t stand a chance when I reach the Collosus [bad word] Twinrova, own those bosses!

- And Honestly,
I’m not giving up, I’m constantly
At war with all the odds you see
Until Ephixa drops the beat

Follow the flag
Follow the ghost
You never know
Where to go

this is the race of Ganondorf
Gonna beat his face with my hand and sword
Look at my wrists, you see I’m flossing
Check this out, my Iron Gauntlets.

Got them from a sandy goddess
Taking over Desert Colossus
Spirit Temple ain’t got [bad word] To stop me from the spirit medallion

- Got to get that mirror shield
Got to look fly before I kill
Man, these blocks were heavy as balls
But now I’m ripped with these new gloves

- Save [bad word] From the witches
Beat Iron Knuckle, He’s a biznitch
Kaepora Gaebora, please don’t talk
Ephixa and I have unfinished business

- Don’t think I can’t get restless
A, B, is what I’m pressing.
- Don’t think you got message [bad word] you is what I’m destined
for.

My Master Quest
to save the princess from the wickedness
of Ganon, duh.
I’ll show you my stamina

Got to save the sages from another wave
Of hatred cause the Ganondorf of evil
Trying to take over the place

And my hearts are going up [bad word] ain’t [bad word] Plus, I got these boss keys
Looking for the exit

But I’m never gonna quit it when my hearts are used up
Cause I got another fairy and some [bad word] s love
But [bad word] out of the breath in this old [bad word] dungeon
I’ll be home in time for the luncheon

Everybody’s thinking that I’m never gonna make it
But I’m taking all these Stalfos and these Gibdos
Turn them into mofos, throw em in the snake pit
Think you’re gonna win? Well you’re mistaken.

- And Honestly,
I’m not giving up, I’m constantly
At war with all the odds you see
Until Ephixa drops the beat

Follow the flag
Follow the ghost
You never know
Where to go