[bad word] Tum Tugger is a curious cat 

If you offer me pheasant I'd rather have grouse
If you put me in a house I would much prefer a flat
If you put me in a flat then I'd rather have a house
If you set me on a mouse then I only want a rat
If you set me on a rat then I'd rather chase a mouse 
 [bad word] Tum Tugger is a curious cat
And there isn't any call for me to shout it
For he will do as he do do
And there's no doing anything about it! 
 [bad word] Tum Tugger is a terrible bore 

When you let me in, then I want to go out
I'm always on the wrong side of every door
And as soon as I'm at home, then I'd like to get about
I like to lie in the bureau drawer
But I make such a fuss if I can't get out 
 [bad word] Tum Tugger is a curious cat
And it isn't any use for you to doubt it
For he will do as he do do
And there's no doing anything about it! 
 [bad word] Tum Tugger is a curious beast 

My disobliging ways are a matter of habit
If you offer me fish then I always want a feast
When there isn't any fish then I won't eat rabbit
If you offer me cream then I sniff and sneer
But I only like what I find for myself
So you'll catch me in it right up to my ears
If you put it away on the larder shelf 
 [bad word] Tum Tugger is artful and knowing [bad word] Tum Tugger doesn't care for a cuddle
But I'll leap in your lap in the middle of your sewing
For there's nothing I enjoy like a horrible muddle! 
 [bad word] Tum Tugger is a curious cat [bad word] Tum Tugger doesn't care for a cuddle 
 [bad word] Tum Tugger is a curious cat
And there isn't any need for me to spout it
For he will do as he do do
And there's no doing anything about it!