I [bad word] round the Highlands on a rainy day
I took a trip and nearly flipped there was a loch in my way
And as I turned around I heard a sound that blew my kilt away
As Nessy said good-day

We had a blether in the heather when I had the idea
water park with Nessy, what a business career
I would be the boss and Nessy my cashier
Selling souvenirs
 [bad word] 

Loch Ness Loch Ness - that’s the place to be
At Loch Ness Loch Ness - Ski Academy
Loch Ness Loch Ness - Nessy, you and me together
Bring all the family

Loch Loch Ness locho locho Loch Ness
Loch Loch Ness locho locho Loch Ness
Loch Loch Ness locho locho Loch Ness
Loch Loch Ness locho locho Loch Ness

Last night they showed a picture on the local TV
of a skier pulled by Nessy flying over the trees
But there’s no such thing as bad [bad word] on it’s nearly free
 [bad word] 

Loch Ness Loch Ness - that’s the place to be
At Loch Ness Loch Ness - Ski Academy
Loch Ness Loch Ness - Nessy, you and me together
Bring all the family

Loch Ness Loch Ness - you can waterski
At Loch Ness Loch Ness - Ski Academy
Loch Ness Loch Ness - Nessy, you and me together
Not far from Dundee

Loch Loch Ness locho locho Loch Ness
Loch Loch Ness locho locho Loch Ness
Loch Loch Ness locho locho Loch Ness
Loch Loch Ness locho locho Loch Ness
 [bad word] 

Loch Ness Loch Ness - that’s the place to be
At Loch Ness Loch Ness - Ski Academy
Loch Ness Loch Ness - Nessy, you and me [bad word] on it’s nearly free

Loch Ness Loch Ness - you can waterski
At Loch Ness Loch Ness - Ski Academy
Loch Ness Loch Ness - Nessy, you and me together