Its your birthday today,
What does that me mean
I’ll guess I try to explain
That 21 years ago on this day
It was the first time
Your parents saw your beautiful face

And nine months before that magical day
Your dad probably took your mom out on a date
And they were havin’ a good time
They were dancin’ and drinking wine

And when they got home
They were horny as [bad word] And your dad threw your mom down on the bed
And he tore her panties off
And his [bad word] was hard as a rock

And then your mom really want to give your dad head
But your dad also wanted to give your mom head
So they formed a 69 and your mom came at least three times
And your dad was so excited to get inside your mom that he forgot to put a condom on

And when he realized his mistake
He had ejaculated and it was too late
And then your mom got pregnant
And your dad started cryin’

He wanted your mom to get an abortion
But your mom wanted a child 

And then nine months later you were born
And then five months later your parents got a divorce