We skipped the light fandango
turned cartwheels 'cross the floor
I was feeling kinda seasick
but the crowd called out for more
The room was humming harder
as the ceiling flew away
When we called out for another drink
the waiter brought a tray

 [bad word] 

     And so it was that later
     as the miller told his tale
     that her face, at first just ghostly,
     turned a whiter shade of pale

She said, 'I'm home on shore leave,'
though in [bad word] we were at sea
so I took her by the looking glass
and would not let her be
saying, 'You must be the mermaid
that took Neptune for a ride.'
But she smiled at me so sadly
that my anger straightway died

 [bad word] 

She said, 'There is no reason
and the [bad word] is plain to see.'
But I wandered through my playing cards
and would not let her be 
one of sixteen vestal virgins
who were leaving for the coast
and although my eyes were open
they might have just as well have been closed

 [bad word] x 2

If music be the food of love
then laughter is its queen
and likewise if behind is in front
then dirt in [bad word] is clean
My mouth by then like cardboard
seemed to slip straight through my head
So we crash-dived straightway quickly
and attacked the ocean bed

 [bad word]