Beelz - Stephen Lynch
 (Intro) 
 I figured since I wrote a song about you know God and Jesus and all that I would have to give the opposition even time. 

 (Song) 
 Ever since first man has walked this Earth I have been here 
 To whisper seeds of doubt and evil thoughts into his ear 
 I am the beast, the outcast angel fallen from on high 
 I go by many names by there is one you cannot deny 
 My name is Satan, hi everybody! 
 Ahh, let me tell you a little about myself 
 My friends all call me old scratch and I am a Capricorn 
 My turn ons are romantic walks and killing the unborn 
 I`ve got little devil horns, and a little Goatee, 
 little devil eyes to help a little devil see 
 little cloven hoofs that make it kinda hard to ski 
 I`m Satan, Woo Hoo! 

 Mephistopheles 

 My real name is Beelzebub, but you can call me Beelz 
 I love to watch Fox news and then go club some baby seals 
 Then I`ll take a bubble bath and drink a Zinfandel 
 Try to wash off that baby seal smell 
 And then I`ll make a toast to me 
 Hey, here`s to my [bad word] . 
 Th… My name is Satan. Ah Hah! 

 To carry on evil ways I went and had a son 
 And now he makes his living as a [bad word] 
 I`m in every Zeppelin album 
 I`m in [bad word] Limbaugh`s rants 
 I`m the reason that the Boston Red Sox even had a chance 

 And if I want to eat your soul, I`ll just throw it on a griddle. 
 I don`t need to make a deal, I don`t need to tell a riddle 
 And [bad word] Charlie Daniels I don`t care if he can fiddle 
 I`m Satan. 

 The Devil went down to Georgia, he was looking for a soul to steal 
 That`s [bad word] [bad word] because I wouldn`t be caught dead in Georgia 
 Ok, it`s like Oh my God! 
 Six, Six, Six! 

 (outro) 
 Satan! Look, that`s just how I picture him. You [bad word] think of whatever you want.