Despair to the point till they provoke
The punchline before they have told the joke
The sheer desperation to be seen
Staring at the television screen

Despair to the point where they provoke
You to tell the [bad word] punchline before you have told the joke
Sorry, sunshine, it doesn't exist
It wasn't in the top 100 list

And it's the thousandth time and it's even bolder,
Don't be surprised when you get bent over,
He told ya, that you were gagging for it

She saw it and she grabbed it and it wasn't what it seemed
The kids all dream of making it, whatever that means

Another variation on a theme
tangle on the television and the magazine
D'you reckon that they do it for a joke?
D'you reckon that they make 'em take an oath?
That says "we are defenders
Of any poseur or professional pretender around"

When did your list replace the twist and turn?
Ah the fist, replaced the kissed-on concern
And if you're bothered, I don't want your prayers
Save it for the morning after

And it's the thousandth time and it's even bolder,
Don't be surprised when you get bent over,
He told ya, that you were gagging for it

Let's have a game on the Teddy Picker
Not quick enough can I have it quicker?
Already thick and you're getting thicker
Let's have a game on the Teddy Picker
Not quick enough can I have it quicker?
Already thick and you're getting thicker

Assuming that all things are equal,
Who'd want to be men of the people
When there's people like you?