Father says it, mother says it
 Sister says it, brother says it
 Uncle says it, Auntie says it
 Everyone at the party says
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 The horse says it, the pig says it
 The judge in his wig says it
 The fox and the rabbit 
 And the nun in her habit says
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 My mate Bill Gates says it
 The President of the United States says it
 The slacker and the worker
 The girl in her burqa says
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 The general with his tank says it
 The man at the bank says it
 The soldier with his rocket
 And the mouse in my pocket says
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 The [bad word] addled wreck
 With a needle in his neck says it
 The [bad word] says it, punk says it
 The brave Buddhist monk says
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 Hit me up, baby, and knock me down
 Drop what you're doing [bad word] around
 We can hold hands till the sun goes down
 Cause I know
 That you 
 And I
 Can be
 Together
 Cause I love you 

 The blind referee says it
 The unlucky amputee says it
 The giant killer bee 
 Landing on my knee says
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 The cop with his breathalyser
 The paddy with his fertiliser
 The man in the basement
 That's getting a taste for it says
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 The [bad word] up Rastafarian says it
 The dribbling libertarian says it
 The sweet little Goth
 With the ears of cloth says 
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe' I'm on fire

 The cross-over country singer says it
 The hump-backed bell ringer says it
 The swinger, the flinger
 The outraged right-winger says
 Babe, I'm on fire 
 Babe, I'm on fire

 The man going hiking says it
 The misunderstood Viking says it
 The man at the rodeo
 And the lonely old Eskimo says 
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire
 [bad word] 

 The mild little Christian says it
 The wild Sonny Liston says it
 The pimp and the gimp
 And the guy with the limp says
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 The blind piano tuner says it
 The Las Vegas crooner says it
 The hooligan mooner
 Holding a schooner says 
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 The Chinese contortionist says it
 The backyard abortionist says it
 The poor Pakistani
 With his lamb Bhirriani says
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 The hopeless defendant says it
 The toilet attendant says it
 The pornographer, the stenographer
 The fashion photographer says
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 The college professor says it
 The vicious cross-dresser says it
 Grandma and Grandpa
 In the back of the car says
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire
 [bad word] 

 The hack at the doorstep says it
 The midwife with her forceps says it
 The demented young lady
 Who is roasting her baby
 On the fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 The athlete with his hernia says it
 Picasso with his Guernica says it
 My wife with her furniture 
 Everybody!
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 The laughing hyena says it
 The homesick polish cleaner says it
 The man from the Klan 
 With a torch in his hand says 
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 The Chinese herbologist says it
 The Christian apologist says it
 The dog and the frog
 Sitting on a log says 
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire

 The foxhunting toff says it
 The horrible moth says it
 The doomed homoual
 With the persistent cough says 
 Babe, I'm on fire
 Babe, I'm on fire
 [bad word] 

 The Papist with his soul says it
 The rapist on a roll says i