All I need is some inspiration,
Before I do somebody some harm.
I feel just like a vegetable,
Down here on the farm.
No [bad word] to see me,
No body here to turn me on.
I ain`t even got a lover,
Down here on the Farm.

They told me to get healthy,
They told me to get some sun.
But boredom eats me like cancer,
Down here on the farm.
Drinking lemonade shandy,
Ain`t nobody here to do me harm.
But I`m like a fish out of water.
Down here on the farm.

I write a thousand letters,
`til my fingers all go numb.
But I, never see no postman,
Down here on the farm.
I called my baby on the telephone,
I say [bad word] down and have some fun,
But she knows what the score is,
Down here on the farm.
I can`t fall in love with the wheat field!
I can`t fall in love with the barn!
When everything smells like horses [bad word] 
Down here on the farm.
Blue skies and swimming pools,
Add so much charm,
But I`d rather be back in Soho,
Than down here on the farm.

On the [bad word] farm!

Are you born in a [bad word] barn or what?
Baaaa!

Hold still...