Everybody wonders what anaesthetists do
while the patient is asleep.
Everybody wonders what we do for three hours
while that machine goes beep.
Everybody reckons we drink coffee and we gossip and we're generally subversive.
Everybody reckons we do crosswords and sudoku's and we chat up all the nurses.

But do you really think that's all we do?
Well let me tell you now it isn't [bad word] 

Cause we sometimes check the screen,
and every now and then we write stuff.
And if we have to intervene,
we inject a bit of white stuff.
And we offer to alter the light,
or the height of the bed.
Or fiddle with the radio, change the CD,
we even check the patient occasionally.
And if they move, we turn op the vapor,
and then we go back, to reading a paper.
Cause when the patient's asleep,
we just sit and listen to the beep,
we just sit and listen to the

Once upon a time I took pride in my job,
but now I think it's time to depart.
Cause I just sit here every day
and listen to blips of the heart