I was just thirty-four years old and I was still wandering in a haze 
I was wondering why everyone I met seemed like they were 
Lost in a maze 

I don't know why I thought I should have some kind of 
Divine right to the blues 
It's sympathy not tears people need when they're the 
Front page sad news. 

The incense burned away and the stench began to rise 
And lovers now estranged avoided catching each others' eyes 

And girls who lost their children cursed the men who fit the coil 
And men not fit for marriage took their refuge in the oil 
No one respects the flame quite like the fool who's badly burned 
From all this you'd imagine that there must be something learned 

Slit skirts, Jeanie never wears those slit skirts 
I don't ever wear no ripped shirts 
Can't pretend that growing older never hurts. 

Knee pants, Jeanie never wears no knee pants 
Have to be so [bad word] to try a new dance 
So afraid of every new romance 

Slit skirts, slit skirt 
Jeanie isn't wearing those slit skirts, slit skirt 
She wouldn't dare in those slit skirts, slit skirt 
Wouldn't be seen dead in no slit skirt 

Slit skirts, slit skirt 
Jeanie isn't wearing those slit skirts, slit skirt 
She wouldn't dare in those slit skirts, slit skirt 
Wouldn't be seen dead in no slit skirt 

Romance, romance, why aren't we thinking up romance? 
Why can't we drink it up [bad word] heart romance 
Just need a brief new romance 

Let me tell you some more about myself, you know I'm sitting at home just now. 
The big events of the day are passed and the late TV shows [bad word] around. 
I'm number one in the home team, but I still feel unfulfilled. 
silent voice in her broken [bad word] that I'm unskilled.

And I know that when she thinks of me, she thinks of me as him,
But, unlike me, she don't work off her [bad word] in the gym. 

Recriminations fester and the past can never change 
woman's [bad word] from both ends of the range 

Once she walked with untamed lovers' face between her legs 
Now he's cooled and stifled and it's she who has to beg 

Slit skirts, Jeanie never wears those slit skirts 
And I don't ever wear no ripped shirts 
Can't pretend that growing older never hurts 

Knee pants, Jeanie never wears no knee pants 
We have to be so [bad word] to try a new dance 
So afraid of every new romance 

Slit skirts, slit skirt 
Jeanie isn't wearing those slit skirts, slit skirt 
She wouldn't dare in those slit skirts, slit skirt 
Wouldn't be seen dead in no slit skirt 

Slit skirts, slit skirt 
Jeanie isn't wearing those slit skirts, slit skirt 
She wouldn't dare in those slit skirts, slit skirt 
Wouldn't be seen dead in no slit skirt 

Romance, romance, why aren't we thinking up romance? 
Why can't we drink it up [bad word] heart romance 
Just need a brief new romance