The fountain was off. 
This is the first time I’ve been back to the city in months. 
I’m trying to hold it together but irony’s found cracks in the foundation. 
And you know, 
I try so hard to be some great white hope 
But I can’t shake the feeling that tonight I’m gonna end up shaking in bed alone. 

I’m not a self-help book; I’m just a [bad word] up kid. 
I had to take my own advice and I did. 
Now I’m waiting for it to sink in. 

Expect me standing tall, back against the wall, 
'Cause what I learned was 
It’s not about forcing happiness; 
It’s about not letting the sadness win. 

I don’t have roses in the closet 
But I’ve got pictures in a drawer 
It’s everything left in me 
Not to stare at them anymore. 
I walked upstairs and shaved my beard. 
I felt like I was holding sadness here
(I was holding sadness here)

I’m not a self-help book; I’m just a [bad word] up kid. 
I had to take my own advice and I did. 
Now I’m waiting for it to sink in. 

Expect me standing tall, back against the wall, 
'Cause what I learned was 
It’s not about forcing happiness; 
It’s about not letting the sadness win. 

I don’t have roses in the closet 
But I’ve got pictures in a drawer 
It’s everything left in me 
Not to stare at them anymore. 

I’m not a self-help book; I’m just a [bad word] up kid. 
I had to take my own advice and I did. 
I’m not a self-help book; I’m just a [bad word] up kid. 
I had to take my own advice and I did.