Out in the west, where the coyotes rest
Lives Ed on a dusty little ranch
400 miles from anything that smiles
Just snakes, tumbleweed,
and countro tapes

Barrels in an old mine,
waiting for the right time
Seepage into waterways and wells
"Cactus got a red head
and my chicken all dead,
I got green spots itchin' me like [bad word] 
 [bad word] ]
High life in the desert wasteland
There's a big mess in the west
Dioxin or heavy metal
It's a big mess in the west
Dump now you'll be payin' later
For the big mess in the west

 [bad word] Inc., preaches ecology"
Boss smiles, holding up recycled cup
But in the night, when evil's out of site
His waste goes on west and disappears

Meanwhile in the distance,
Ed is kinda' [bad word] and

[ From: [bad word] /www [bad word] mess-in-the-west-lyrics-tankard.html ]

All his cows are growing funny horns
Ed is losing his hair,
and he's full of despair
"Christ Almighty, everything is wrong!"
 [bad word] 

Out in the west, where the coyotes rest
Lived Ed on a dusty little ranch
400 miles from anything that smiles
Just snakes, tumbleweed,
and country tapes

Ed was taken east
and noone ever missed him
Had no kids, no relatives, no wife
Then he was dissected,
data were corrected
But they won't be published on hour life
 [bad word]