woman is the sweetest thing
on that we all agree
but when she gets the wedding band
a mans no longer free

That's why I'm safe, sane and single
I'm on my merry way
Yes I'm safe, sane and single
that's how I'm gonna stay

wife and husband came upon
the parting of their ways
the judge gave her the bank account
and gave him 90 days

That's why I'm safe, sane and single
I'm on my merry way
Yes I'm safe, sane and single
that's how I'm gonna stay

friend of mine got married
to a gal named Nellie Gray
she pawned his watch then sold his car
and gave his clothes away

That's why I'm safe, sane and single
I'm on my merry way
Yes I'm safe, sane and single
that's how I'm gonna stay

I met a gal in Birmingham
and thereby hangs a tale
she had a husband doing time
another out on bail

That's why I'm safe, sane and single
I'm on my merry way
Yes I'm safe, sane and single
that's how I'm gonna stay

I courted a gal for 15 years
her Pa said we should wed
if my horse could only cook
I'd marry him instead

That's why I'm safe, sane and single
I'm on my merry way
Yes I'm safe, sane and single
that's how I'm gonna stay