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(Eminem) Ay, yo This next song, is a [bad word] story [bad word] here, [bad word] ) Cause some things in this universe, don't make sense But somehow always seem to [bad word] work VERSE ONE - Eminem Driving down I-75, about to hop on 696 I look over, this [bad word] chick's tryina' fix her makeup, I'm like [bad word] You ain't a plastic surgeon, I advise ya to put up your visor I'm getting kinda ticked, you're blocking my side mirror She's like yeah? so? I'm like so? You gon' need a stitch you keep actin' like that, ho I look like your husband [bad word] That's a rhetorical question You talk to me like you talk to him, I'll [bad word] you up In fact, get in the backseat, like the rest of my dates No [bad word] rides shotgun, what? Taxi? Stop and pick you some Maxi Pads up? Is that what you actually ask me? (smack) [bad word] reaches over and smacks me And says I annoy the [bad word] outta her Get in the [bad word] back, put on your [bad word] powder You [bad word] what? Shut the [bad word] up now, or get your feelings hurt Worse than my last chick, when I accidentally butt dialed her And she heard me spreading [bad word] about her Turn the radio up louder, make it thump While I bump that Relapse CD, tryina' hit every bump In that...till I snap back in that accent Cause she kept asking me to stop callin' her [bad word] I SAID THAT [bad word] HOOK - Eminem She said, Marshall you ain't really like that, oh oh oh Your putting on a show, where's your mic at? Cause you're breaking my heart, you're breaking my heart x2 VERSE TWO - Royce Uh, pull up to the club in a Porsche, not a Pinto While Marshall's at a white trash party, I'm at drama central I walk up in there looking at my phone on twitter tweetin' I'm feelin' a bunch of [bad word] lookin' at a [bad word] cheesin' I get approached by this little skeeser She asked me if I'm the real G, cause I'm Gucci from head to feet I said, yeah, I'm really is, cause I spit in your man's face Like Cam did that kid on Killa Season She said I'm feeling a bit of ego Wait, am I talking wrong? I said nah, I'm a walking Kanye/Beyonce song. She said I'm mad at you, I said why? She said why you never make songs for chicks as if it's hard to do? I said I make songs for me, leave the studio And go and [bad word] the [bad word] who belongs to makin' songs for you She said I'm feelin' your whole swagger and flow, can we hook up? I said, eh, you just used the word swagger so NO (hook) VERSE THREE - Eminem We been ridin' around in this hatchback 'till I'm [bad word] hunchback Where the [bad word] s this party at slutbag [bad word] Cut what act? Think it's an act? [bad word] that, I'm tryina' ...?....finest love shack Or somewhere to [bad word] at, eh? Don't touch that You fat [bad word] I'm tryina hear some Bagpipes from Baghdad Don't act like you don't like em', them accents I rap tight, and I'mma torture 'till we find this place, yeah that's right Thought it was just past this light, past Van [bad word] Better hit that map right, read them directions Oh yeah you can't read, and you can't write Told me that last night, she took my CD out the deck Snapped in half like, Relapse sucked I snapped, hit the gas like, blew through the light Spun out, hit a patch of black ice Forgot we had a trailer hitch to the back We jackknifed, [bad word] flew out of the car I laughed like, she deserved it She didn't think I'd act like that in person (Yo, Royce, Marshall just crashed right in front of the club!) VERSE FOUR - Royce Tell him I'll be there in a minute, I'm tryina break up this cat fight Between my mistress and my [bad word] wife Then a chick wanted a hug, but she was fat