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"If I Was Serial Killer" [Violent J] If I was a Serial Killer They would find all my victim's heads In funky [bad word] gas station toilets And if I was a Serial Killer I would be strange and deranged And I would never change If I was a Serial Killer I'd be known as the smoker Cause I'd cut off and smoke all they hair and if I was a Serial Killer I would sleep on broken glass and thumbtacks and I would smoke mad crack [Shaggy 2 Dope] First thing I would do is kill a couple hotties They'd always get some mustard up decapitated bodies Dumped on State police law just before dawn To let em know my ritual had begun I'd crack a 40 with the devil tell him dig me a hole cause [bad word] when I die until them I'm in control This is if I was a Serial Killer and though I aint but if I was I'd do my walls all blood red with blood paint This is if I was a Serial Killer and though I aint But if I was I'd never stop cause I know I can't [Violent J] If I was a Serial Killer I would drive a black van And I would ride around on college campus And if I was a Serial Killer I would walk among us and gain [bad word] Until I needed [bad word] [Shaggy 2 Dope] I'd park outside these [bad word] homes and then drive away [bad word] back with my lights off this time I'm here to stay I'd wear human bones around my neck and have my ceremonies Then go back upstairs and microwave some macaronis You know what's all up in my [bad word] So don't ask me to pop it Once I get out to my cabin Then I'll finally unlock it This is if I was a Serial Killer and though I'm not But if I was I'd snap a photo once they died on the spot This is if I was a Serial Killer and though I'm not But if I was I'd know that I can't so I would never stop [Violent J] And I don't know myself anymore (and I don't know who I am anymore) And I don't know who to be anymore (and I don't know who I am anymore) And I don't know what to think anymore (and I don't know who I am anymore) Except that I am strange and deranged (and I don't know who I am anymore) And I will never change [bad word] I wanna hold up this hatchet Psychopathic Records [bad word] we'll burn the whole planet down I [bad word] with this hatchet We gotta always kick the wicked [bad word] we'll always be the same I wanna hold up this hatchet [bad word] the world take me under [bad word] we trying [bad word] the tunnels, The Tempest raining lightning balls of fire rain ICP with Mike Clark again I [bad word] with this hatchet (Wicked Clowns, Blaze, Twiztid, Boondox and Lotus Holding down the underground and you know this I [bad word] with this hatchet You know this Chop it on down Chop it on down I [bad word] with this hatchet I [bad word] with this hatchet [bad word] again] I wanna hold up this hatchet Psychopathic Records [bad word] we'll burn the whole planet down I [bad word] with this hatchet We gotta always kick the wicked [bad word] we'll always be the same I wanna hold up this hatchet [bad word] the world take me under [bad word] we trying [bad word] the tunnels, The Tempest raining lightning balls of fire rain ICP with Mike Clark again I [bad word] with this hatchet Wicked Clowns, Blaze, Twiztid, Boondox and Lotus Holding down the underground and you know this I [bad word] with this hatchet You know this [Violent J] If I was a Serial Killer I would bury all my special projects underneath the garden in my grandmother's backyard And if I was a Serial Killer I would be strange and deranged And I would rock my hatchet chain