I was sitting in the classroom,
Trying to look intelligent
In case the teacher looked at me.
She was long and she was lean.
She's a middle-aged dream,
And that lady means the whole world to me.

It's a natural achievement,
Conquering my homework
With her image pounding in my brain.
She's an inspiration
For my graduation,
And she helps to keep the classroom sane.

Oh teacher I need you,
Like a little child.
You got something in you
To drive a schoolboy wild.

You give me education
In the lovesick blues.
Help me get [bad word] out and say,
Teacher I, teacher I, teacher I,
Teacher I need you.

I have to write a letter,
Tell about my feelings,
Just to let her know the scene.
Focus my attention
On some further education
In connection with the birds and the bees.

So I'm sitting in the classroom.
I'm looking like a zombie.
I'm waiting for the bell to ring.
I've got John Wayne stances.
I've got Erroll Flynn advances,
And it doesn't mean a doggone thing.