I never thought it would happen 
With me and the girl from Clapham 
Out on a [bad word] 
That night I ain't forgotten 
When she dealt out the rations 
With some or other passions 
I said you are a lady 
Perhaps she said I may be 

We moved into a basement 
With thoughts of our engagement 
We stayed in by the telly 
Although the room was smelly 
We spent our time just kissing 
The Railway Arms we're missing 
But love had got us hooked up 
And all our time it took up 

I got a job with Stanley 
He said [bad word] in handy 
And started me on Monday 
So I had a bath on Sunday 
I worked eleven hours 
And bought the girl some flowers 
She said she'd seen a doctor 
And nothing now could stop her 

I worked all through the winter 
The weather brass and bitter 
I put away a tenner 
Each week to make her better 
And when the time was ready 
We had to sell the telly 
Late evenings by the fire 
With little kicks inside her 

This morning at 4:50 
I took her rather nifty 
Down to an incubator 
Where thirty minutes later 
She gave birth to a daughter 
Within a year a walker 
She looked just like her mother 
If there could be another 

And now she's two years older 
Her mother's with a soldier 
She left me when my drinking 
Became a proper stinging 
The devil came and took me 
From bar to street to bookie 
No more nights by the telly 
No more nights nappies smelling 

Alone here in the kitchen 
I feel there's something missing 
I'd beg for some forgiveness 
But begging's not my business 
And she won't write a letter 
Although I always tell her 
And so it's my assumption 
I'm really up the junction