Well Mr. Burns had done it
    The power plant had won it
    With Roger Clemens clucking all the while
    Mike Scioscia's tragic illness made us smile
    While Wade Boggs lay unconscious on the barroom tile...

    We're talkin' softball...
    From Maine to San Diego
    Talkin' softball...
    Mattingly and Canseco
    Ken Griffey's grotesquely swollen jaw
    Steve Sax and [bad word] in with the law
    We're talkin' Homer...
    Ozzie and the Straw.

    We're talkin' softball...
    From Maine to San Diego
    Talkin' softball...
    Mattingly and Canseco
    Ken Griffey's grotesquely swollen jaw
    Steve Sax and [bad word] in with the law
    We're talkin' Homer...
    Ozzie and the Straw.