I'm a Ravenclaw
I like to read books
When I cast spells 
They' re off the freakin' hook

I'm a Gryffindor
I'll fly with my friends
We'll never back down 
And fight to the end

I'm a Slytherin
I am very rich
I'll go on a date 
With whoever gets the snitch

I'm a Hufflepuff
Just stayin' relax
Gimme drinks and friends
No feuds, we got fact

Ew, who brought a Hufflepuff?
Hey, I'm just trying to have a good time over here

good time!

I’m a Ravenclaw
Got wit beyond measure
I can catch a Snitch 
Like it's caught up in a tether

I’m a Slytherin
The house of a [bad word] get in my way
And get tossed in the lake

I’m a Gryffindor
And we own the sky
Yeah we always win 
With our rally cry

I’m a Slytherin
The top of my class
If you disagree
I’ll kick your Muggle [bad word] 
Uh Alan, do you even know what Harry Potter is?
Well, I haven't read the books, but I've seen all the movies!

Let's beat him up!

I’m a Slytherin
big fan of Snape
If it's a Mom album 
We have to say Snape

I’m a Hufflepuff
We’re [bad word] to the end
United we stand
So I stand with my friends

I’m a Gryffindor
As brave as [bad word] And my namesake sword
Will get the job done

I’m a Ravenclaw
My brain is super fast
Like Shelden Cooper
But not a total [bad word] 
So who's this Sheldon Cooper guy anyway Aaron?
He's from the show The Big Bang Thoery.

You're out of the band..

He's so Spock!
I don't want to go!