Happy anniversary, schools are short of funds 
This is what I say, give the kids more guns 
All of the classes are on how to kill 
If you don’t teach them then someone else will 

Happy Death-Day to Columbine… 
Let’s make the world an Oklahoma City, fine 
Wacky-Waco Happy Death Day, babies that were burned 
The Wheel has turned! 

Happy Death-Day to you! 
Happy Death-Day to you! 

Barricades are growing in the halls 
Bullet holes are stitching in the walls 
The students are well-armed but so are the pigs 
This thing is gonna be big 

We must now attack the very children that we taught 
That they must never fight the [bad word] up wars that we had fought 
Someone detonates a bomb, they said that it was huge 
Bull dozed all the evidence and blamed it on some stooge 

Happy Death-Day to Columbine… 
Let’s make the world an Oklahoma City, fine 
Wacky-Waco Happy Death Day, babies that were burned 
Hey look! The Wheel has turned! 

There’s only one way to save you 
Rape and maim and enslave you 
Finish what we started 
I guess you could say that God farted