You won't find Hatesville on any maps
It's easy to get to
But you can't go by train, or plane, or car
You need a ticket to get there from here
And you're listening to that ticket this very minute, dad
one-way ticket, first class

See, Hatesville exists partway between the heart and the mind
It's that place in the soul where hate dwells
And we're here the point the way

Why?
Because hate is groovy
Because it's fun
And it's necessary
And it lives inside you every second of every day

And you know what?
You need hate
And we need to let you hate, because we're your friends
And we want to see you happy, and healthy, and just a little bit angry

So don't hold back or hesitate
Sit back, smile, relax, and hate
Everyone needs a scapegoat
Everyone needs a whipping boy
When you find someone to hate
It fills your heart with joy