'Oh, Mrs. McGrath,' the sergeant said
'Would you like to make a soldier out of your son Ted
With a scarlett coat and a big [bad word] hat
Oh, Mrs. McGrath, wouldn't you like that?'

 [bad word] 
With your too-ri-a, fol-di-diddle-da, too-ri, oor-ri, oor-ri-a
With your too-ri-a, fol-di-diddle-da, too-ri, oor-ri, oor-ri-a

Now, Mrs. McGrath lived on the sea shore
For the space of seven long years or more
She spied a [bad word] into the bay
'Here's my son Teddy, wisha clear the way'

 [bad word] 

'Oh captain dear, where have you been
Or have you been sailing on the Meditereen
Have you any tidings of my son Ted
Is the poor boy living or is he dead?'

 [bad word] 

Then up came Ted without any legs
And in their place, he had two wooden pegs
She kissed him a dozen times or two
'Holy Moses, it isn't you'

 [bad word] 

'Now were you [bad word] or were you blind
When you left your two fine legs behind
Or was it walking upon the say
Wore your two fine legs from the knees away?'

 [bad word] 

'No, I wasn't [bad word] and I wasn't blind
When I left my two fine legs behind
big cannon ball on the fifth of May
Tore my two fine legs from the knees away'

 [bad word] 

'Oh, Teddy my boy,' the widow cried
'Your two fine legs were your mammy's pride
Stumps of a tree wouldn't do at all
Why didn't [bad word] from the big cannon ball?'

 [bad word] 

'All foreign wars I do proclaim
Between Don John and the King of Spain
I'd rather have my Teddy as he used to be
Than the King of France and his whole navy'