Michael: Mom, I don’t need a new coat. I like my old trench coat. [bad word]  and I can use it as a raincoat and an overcoat. So what do I need a new coat for? 

Lisa: If you’re going to visit your aunt in Maine, you’ll need something warmer than a trench coat. This parka is nice. 

Michael: I’m not wearing a parka. If I’m not warm enough, I’ll wear my denim jacket under my trench coat. 

Lisa: That’s ridiculous. You can’t wear a jacket and a coat each time you go outside. Look, this down coat will keep you nice and warm. It has a high collar, a hood, and thick cuffs, and it’s very roomy so you’ll be [bad word] in it. 

Michael: It’s too long. I don’t need a knee- length coat. 

Lisa: Yes, you do. You’ve never been in really cold weather and when you get there, you’ll be thankful to have something so warm. Now, we also need to buy you a blazer. 

Michael: blazer? What for? 

Lisa: Your aunt is probably going to take you to some nice places and I don’t want you to look like a bum. See? This one is nice and [bad word]  

Michael: It’s trimmed with flowers! 

Lisa: Those aren’t flowers. They’re paisleys. You’ll look very nice in it. 

Michael: Please, Mom, don’t make me wear that. I’m begging you. 

Lisa: You’ll look like a nice young man in this coat and blazer. 

Michael: I’ll be the laughing stock of the entire State of Maine. 

Lisa: No you won’t. Now, we need to buy you some new underwear. 

Michael: Mom! Shhh! Not so loud. This is so embarrassing!