How did [bad word] to this? 
Once seemed like I had it, 
But now it’s gone 
For long time I waited 
For long time I believed 
Only to find my own disenchantment  [bad word] devouring innocence 
Reality [bad word] fantasy 
Selling out my blood for forgiveness 
Giving away joy to receive discontent 

Everything seemed clear before, 
Now I don’t know who I am anymore 
Silent dissatisfaction eating me up 
Sweet asphyxia growing inside 

There's nothing you say that will mean something for me 
There’s nothing you do that will bring me back 
Slowly falling apart even when nobody realizes 

You see me smiling but I’m not there 
I hear you talking but I don’t care 
Dense atmosphere of despair, 
Silent descending to end 

Black inertia disintegration