If you live around here, you need cash in the bank.
'Cos the houses 'round here are all flashy and swank.
An' the front bit is what's called a facade!
All the people 'round here are as posh as can be.
You won't see 'em hob-nobbin' [bad word] like me.
It's the snob bit, also called a facade!

Every day people in their own sweet way
Like to add a coat of paint and be what they ain't!
That's how their little game is played
Livin' out their masquerade
Gettin' rich an' gettin' laid!
Who'd want to trade?

But there's one thing I know an' I know it for sure
This disease that they've got has got no ready cure.
An' I'm certain life is terribly hard
When yer life's a facade!

Every night here on house or another is a fun house
'Cos of someone givin' a party as you see, Sir!
This one here tonight is rather special - am I right?
It's the betrothal of Sir Danvers' daughter, Lisa!

Sir Danvers Carew is a good man
They call him "La creme de la creme".
Whatever that means, he's a bloody sight better than them!

Nearly everyone you meet when walking down a London street 
Pretends to be a pillar of society.
model of propriety, sobriety and piety
Who's never even heard of notoriety!
The ladies an' gents here before you
Which none of 'em ever admits
May have saintly looks, but they're sinners an' crooks
Hypocrites!

If you live around here you need lots of panache.
If you live in town, dear, then you must cut a dash.
'Tisn't hard, dear, to create a facade!
You must seem to be rich and have money to burn.
Even though it's a [bad word]  spending more than you earn.
That's the game here and the name is facade!

One or two might look kinda well-to-do.
But I betcha precious few have paid for their boots!
I'm inclined to think half mankind thinks the other half is blind.
Wouldn't be surprised to find they're all in cahoots!

At the end of the day they don't mean what they say
They don't say what they mean, they don't [bad word] clean.
An' the answer is it's all a facade!
Call a walk "Promenade", call a street "Boulevard"
Grease yer hair with "Pomade" you'll be held in regard.
An' I betcha if you stay on your guard
They'll all say you're a "Card".
People love the facade.
What's behind the facade?
Look behind...the facade!