Employee: [bad word] to [bad word]  What can I get for you? 

Jared: I’m still deciding. I’m trying to lose weight and I hear that eating a sandwich for lunch every day will help me do that. Do you guys have a BLT or a club? 

Employee: We don’t have a BLT, but we do have a ham or turkey club. 

Jared: Okay, I’ll take the club. 

Employee: Ham or turkey? 

Jared: Can I get half and half, or better yet, can I get double ham and double turkey? 

Employee: Sure, no problem. 

Jared: I’d like cheese on that, too. 

Employee: Would you like your bread toasted and the cheese melted? 

Jared: Uh, sure. 

Employee: What else would you like on your sandwich, the works? 

Jared: [bad word] with the works? 

Employee: It includes lettuce, tomatoes, onions, bell peppers, olives, and pickles, and any spreads, condiments, or seasonings you’d like. 

Jared: Oh, okay. I’ll have the works, but hold the pickles and olives. I’d like mayonnaise on the side, too, please. You know what? I’d like to add some chicken to that. 

Employee: That’ll be $1.20 additional. 

Jared: That’s fine. I’d also like extra cheese, and why don’t you add some roast beef, too? 

Employee: Okay, I can do that. Will that be all? 

Jared: Yeah, but while you’re at it, throw in two bags of chips and a couple of cookies. 

Employee: Okay, I can ring you up down here. 

Jared: Hey, tell me, how long before I start losing weight? 

Employee: Well, that’s hard to say. You may want to look at the nutritional information chart to determine that. 

Jared: Nah, I can already feel the [bad word] off!