I just moved in my new house today
 Moving was hard but I got squared away
 When bells starting rings and chains rattled loud
 I knew I'd moved in a haunted house
 Still I made up my mind to stay
 Nothing was a-gonna drive me away
 When I seen something that give me the creeps
 Had one big eye and two big feet
 I stood right there and I did the freeze
 It did the stroll right up to me
 Made a noise with its feet that sounded like a [bad word]  Said "You gonna be here when the [bad word] "
 "Say yes, I'll be here when the [bad word]  I'll be right here, I ain't [bad word]  I bought this house, now I am boss
 Ain't no haint's [bad word] me off"
 
In my kitchen my stove was a blazing hot
 Coffee was a-boiling in the pot
 Grease had melted in my hand (pan?)
 I had a hunk of meat in my hand
 From out of space there sat a man
 On the hot stove with the pots and pans
 "Say that's hot" I began to shout 
He drank the hot coffee right from the spout
 He ate the raw meat right from my hand
 Drank the hot grease from the frying pan
 And said to me "You [bad word] and don't be here
 When the [bad word] 
 Say yes I'll be here when the [bad word]  I'll be right here now, I ain't [bad word]  I bought this house now I am boss
 Ain't no haint's [bad word] me off.