Ladies and gentlemen... and lowlifes
It is with outstanding pleasure
that we are here to present tonight...
Slick Rick [bad word] #33; And MC Ricky D!!
Doing their smash hit "Mona Lisa "
you know like the picture?
Anyway I'd like to take this time out
to bow before his divine majesty

[Ricky] Oh your majesty...
[Slick] Hmm?
[Ricky] Can I kiss your hand?
[Slick] Mm hmm
[Ricky] (kisses his hand loudly)
[Slick] Enough!
 [bad word] your highness.. they await you..

[Slick Rick]
Well, it was one of those days -- not much to do
I was chillin downtown, with my old school crew
I went into a store -- to buy a slice of pizza
And bumped into a girl, her name was Mona -- what?
Mona Lisa (what?) *singing* Mona Lisa, so men made you..
YouknowhatI'msayin? So I said, "Excuse me, dear
my gosh, you look nice!
Put away your money
I'll buy that slice!"
She said, "Thanks - I'd rather a slice of you
I'm just kidding, but that's awfully nice of you"
 [bad word] showed she had a mind in her
And when I smiled (PING!) I almost blinded her
She said, "Great Scott! Are you a thief?
Seems like you have a mouth full of gold teeth"
Ha-ha, hah! Had to find that funny
So I said, "No child, I work hard for the money
And calling me a thief? Please! Don't even try it (Right!)
Sit down eat your slice of pizza, and be quiet"
She almost got cut short -- you know, scissors
She tried to disrespect WHO?! The Grand Wizard
Me! "Well what's your name, son?"
"MC Ricky D," but not to be so harsh I said to Mona Li-hee
"I'm.. sorry and I know that's low class (uhh, yeah)
Please sit, and tell me a little about your past"
She said, "Well I got courage, and I don't like porridge (uh-huh)
I've never been to college, but I've got crazy knowledge (uh-huh)
Over eighteen and my eyes are green (uh-huh)
I wear more gold than that man on A-Team (uh-huh, uh-huh)
Trim, slim, (yeah) and I'm also light skinned
Best believe Mona's a virgin"
virgin?! Honey needed a slap
She tried to tell me she's a virgin -- with her yea wide gap
I said, "It don't matter, see, I'm not picky (word)
Let me spell my name out for you, it's Ricky:
R -- Ravishing
I -- Impress
-- Courageous; so careless
K -- for the Kangols which I've got
that I wear everyday and
Y -- why not?
To fight's not right that I recite and I'm..
quite polite like Walter Cronkite"
Well, just about then, Trevor my friend came in
He said, "Hey Rick, don't you know playin with these snakes is a sin?!?"
He grabbed me by my shirt and pulled me right out the store
He said, "I don't want to see you playin with these lowlifes no more!
 [bad word] along, we have a party to attend
With some real mature women and some more of her friends"
He hailed down a cab and he waited for a minute
And as the cab came, he [bad word] me in it!
And as we were leavin and drivin along
I could hear a melody as Mona sang a song

(excerpt from "Walk On By" [D. Warwick])
"If you see me walking down the street
And I start to cry.. each time we meet..
Walk on by.. walk on by..
Foolish pride
That's all that I have left, so, let me hide
The pain and the hurt that you gave me
When you said goodbye..
You walked on by.."